well my birthday was pretty good. went to the bar with a group of friends and some met later and i know people that work at the bar. definitely had enough to drink that night. out of nowhere they brought a cake out and sang lol and after that thats when the memory starts slippin haha! and anymore i dont like gettin that drunk because the next day it fucks with my anxiety. i used to never give a fuck and in the past year somethin happened to me. im getting older with nothing to show for, hate my job and im that person that'll refuse to change my appearance for anyone. my beliefs are strong but my actions arent, ill admit that. and thats where i dont get anywhere cause i have fear. also on my mind, its been over a half year-ish since i broke up with my girlfriend of almost 4 years, think im startin to not like not having anyone but i like being free. going back with her is not in my mind and if i did it'd be for the wrong reasons. im never been too confident with myself but i want to meet new girls, a new beginning. i need change, big time! i could use a few more friends that are into my kind of music, even tho i bounce around. but as we all dream, i still practice singing cause i enjoy it, i was in a few bands but that was covers or filling in for somene, i was never in a writing process. i feel like if i were, and i have tons of ideas of what i want to create and i have tons of lyrics, which lately i need to get back into. i know trying to make a living that way is hard but i just feel that music is the only thing for me. i cant play instruments but i feel over the years my vocals gotten better. i have friends in bands that i def know that cant hit things that i do. i dont know, i just wish my life was more exciting and worth while.. well thats all thats been on my mind lately
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