traceelement:
totally man it is a scary thought... I thought I was supposed to be responsible or somethign by now ... if not that at least respectable tongue biggrin
traceelement:
oh and dude I know exactly how you feel with that situation...
ampersand:
I feel like I'm 16 again far more often than I would like. That is certainly a tricky situation. Been there I have. It's not fun.

Too many threads already dealing with the nice guy syndrome. I think the end result is always going to be 'you're damned if you do and damned if you don't'

And so ends the least helpful advice ever. I wish you luck.

Cheers to you, from one music snob to another. I don't deal well when not-my-music is playing. Not well at all.
luz:
well, does she like you?

certainly you have an idea one way or the another about her feelings.

sometimes, when there's issues that seem to invite pondering for an indeterminate amount of time...

i assign the issue a determinate amount of time and insist i make a decision.

'cause you've got to be decisive.

for example: "should i break up with person x to be with person y?"

one could balance reasons forever, and nothing will ever happen.

so:
"I have 4 days to decide if i'm going to stay w/ person x. what i feel on the 4th day is what i do."

just a bit of advice.
(like i'm in any position to give that)

wink
captain_dusty:
I was sailing that ship late last year... I wanted to jump ship so much.. Its a hard decision, but luckily for me my best pal fled the country and now lives in Canada!! haha well that sucks but at least I didnt have to think about it, but when she returns I will be in the same boat again....

I wish there was a rulebook to this kind of thing. Why is it so hard?
bridehead:
Ahhhh...dude!
Only remedy is to find someone better. Truly.
That's if you WANT to remedy the sitch and not "fuck it up".
I've beeen there and there's no easy way out.
Think really really carefully before you act. If you act.
Sorry if I sound like a hard-ass, but that sort of complicated crap is something to be avoided... EL SUICIDO LOCO
pavlovs_sheep:
Feel free to ignore me, but logically you must say/do something:

If you don't, and you are genuinely falling in love with the girl, then you are not being honest or fair with either of yourselves.

If you do, and she isnt interested, at least you will know and can either bury the relationship or your feelings. If the friendship doesnt survive, then was it that good a friendship anyway?

If you do, and she is interested, then thats a good thing. Isnt it?

I remember asking my grandfather if he had any regrets, and him saying that the only things he regretted were the unanswered questions from the times when he didnt do something; take the high-risk job; travel the world; ask the girl out. You know the sort of thing.

Carpe femina!
rockyboulders:
yeah. i gotta agree with pavlov. if you don't do it then you'll be wondering 'what if' for the rest of your life. but if you do and it doesn't work out you can always try to repair the friendship. i dunno though... my love life at the moment isn't the healthiest it's ever been.
shifter:
I couldn't say where to go on this one. Similar situation a few years back, except the girl was going out with another of my mates.

Yeah that ended badly for all involved.

But whatever you do, don't bottle it up. It'll kill you, and the what if feelings are the worst things down the track.
natatree:
From my experience, it always comes from the place you least expect it, or when you are not ready for it. I'm sure you will make the right choice n your actions.