Well, I haven't posted here in a while, and I feel like ranting a bit so you lucky people get to read it if you so desire!
But before the rant, the good stuff! I went to Warped Tour on Saturday and generally had a great time. Bad Religion and Flogging Molly were great, and before they went on, I got to see a bunch of really good bands that I had either never heard of before, or if I had heard of them I never got around to giving their music a chance. So congratulations to NOFX, Big D and the Kids Table, Anti-Flag, and Ivy League. You folks have a new fan and I'll be checking. out more of your music later. Thanks for the great show.
Now for the rant. All these bands put on a fantastic show, and I really enjoyed myself, but it could have been even better if it wasnt for:
THE TOP 5 TYPES OF CONCERT-GOING ASSHOLES
5. SCENE KIDS - Alright, they aren't really assholes, but the music they listen to is generally not good and they confuse the fuck out of me. It's impossible to tell from behind whether they are male or female, and for some of them it's impossible to tell from any angle. They didn't really have a negative effect on my day, because they were going to different stages to see their bands, but I just needed a 5th group to round out the list and they were the first one to pop into my head.
What are you!?
4. THE ASSHOLES SETTING THE FOOD PRICES - I understand that any time you go to a large event where the host has a monopoly on food and drinks, especially one that is about 10 hours long, the prices are going to be pretty damn high. But to keep people there for that long, with no water fountains, no re-entry, and $5 water bottles or $6 gatorade as the only means to stave off heat stroke is damn near criminal. If I didn't have to spend $40+ on shitty food and drinks during the day, I might actually have had money to spend to support the bands I went there to see by buying some merch or CDs. Imagine that! Not only was the food expensive, but I think it was possibly the shittiest form of that particular type of food I'd ever seen.
Imagine this, with no toppings, and a smaller, drier, more burnt piece of chicken.
Now give me $9 and you can have one of your very own!
3. THE HUMAN WRECKING BALL - This asshole is about 300 lbs of "Fuck you, I don't care that there's no space here, I'm gonna make some and 'dance' as hard as I can!" I had the pleasure of standing next to this mound of destruction for the first part of the Flogging Molly set, about 4 rows of people from the front center of the stage. I gladly relinquished my place there and moved off to the side of the stage (only partly by choice) after the first fast song. As soon as any song picked up, this guy starts flying from side to side, 5 feet in either direction of his original spot in an area where you're lucky to have an inch of space in any direction, plowing over the rest of the people that had been standing there for hours to get a good spot for the bands they wanted to see. It was almost like he was trying to start a mosh pit, except that he WAS the pit. Speaking of mosh pits, on to the next asshole!
Like this, except those garbage cans are people.
2. THE TAZMANIAN DEVIL - So a pit starts up at a show, and everyone is bouncing around in there and having a good time. There's good natured shoving, people that fall get helped up, and the risk of injury is pretty low. Then this asshole spins into the pit, fists flying in all directions. They also seem to travel in groups, and as soon as one hops in three more assholes join him and punch in random directions. At about this time, 80% of the people who had been in the pit having a good time back out, and it's just these assholes that are left. Oddly enough, most of the people that were there in the first place don't enjoy getting punched in the face. But these guys are so hardcore, they don't give a fuck and just keep on flailing, inevitably spinning a fist into someone's face on the edge of the pit who wasn't even trying to be a part of it. Nice job, asshole, you just made that set a lot less enjoyable for a lot of people.
This motherfucker, right here.
1. CROWD SURFERS - I hate these people almost more than words can describe. I came to the show so I could enjoy some music and watch a great band do their thing on stage, not to constantly look back over my shoulder so I can be ready to military press your fat ass. My biggest problem with these selfish, attention whoring assholes is that the people they affect the most are the people that most want to pay attention to the music and enjoy the show - the people who have been waiting around for hours to get a good spot near the stage, front and center. What the fuck is the point, other than the above-mentioned attention whoring and getting your ass touched by a few hundred people? Is it to get a closer view of the band for a few seconds? If that's the case, then join those of us who are interested in actually seeing the band and wait for a good spot before the show. We'll talk about the band and have a great time waiting. It won't be boring, I promise. At least my buddy the human wrecking ball up there was around for a while before the set and earned his view. Also, if you weigh more than 150 lbs, there's no reason you should even consider crowd surfing. I came there to see a show, not get a work-out, and lifting a sweaty, shirtless 230 lbs dude does not fit into that. One of these fuckers pissed me off even more than they usually do at every other concert I've been to. He somehow managed to kick the button-thingy off the top of my brand new hat as I parried his foot away from my face. What. The. Fuck.
See those threads at the top of the hat that I bought 2 days before the concert?
That's where the little button that holds the hat together used to be.
But before the rant, the good stuff! I went to Warped Tour on Saturday and generally had a great time. Bad Religion and Flogging Molly were great, and before they went on, I got to see a bunch of really good bands that I had either never heard of before, or if I had heard of them I never got around to giving their music a chance. So congratulations to NOFX, Big D and the Kids Table, Anti-Flag, and Ivy League. You folks have a new fan and I'll be checking. out more of your music later. Thanks for the great show.
Now for the rant. All these bands put on a fantastic show, and I really enjoyed myself, but it could have been even better if it wasnt for:
THE TOP 5 TYPES OF CONCERT-GOING ASSHOLES
5. SCENE KIDS - Alright, they aren't really assholes, but the music they listen to is generally not good and they confuse the fuck out of me. It's impossible to tell from behind whether they are male or female, and for some of them it's impossible to tell from any angle. They didn't really have a negative effect on my day, because they were going to different stages to see their bands, but I just needed a 5th group to round out the list and they were the first one to pop into my head.
What are you!?
4. THE ASSHOLES SETTING THE FOOD PRICES - I understand that any time you go to a large event where the host has a monopoly on food and drinks, especially one that is about 10 hours long, the prices are going to be pretty damn high. But to keep people there for that long, with no water fountains, no re-entry, and $5 water bottles or $6 gatorade as the only means to stave off heat stroke is damn near criminal. If I didn't have to spend $40+ on shitty food and drinks during the day, I might actually have had money to spend to support the bands I went there to see by buying some merch or CDs. Imagine that! Not only was the food expensive, but I think it was possibly the shittiest form of that particular type of food I'd ever seen.
Imagine this, with no toppings, and a smaller, drier, more burnt piece of chicken.
Now give me $9 and you can have one of your very own!
3. THE HUMAN WRECKING BALL - This asshole is about 300 lbs of "Fuck you, I don't care that there's no space here, I'm gonna make some and 'dance' as hard as I can!" I had the pleasure of standing next to this mound of destruction for the first part of the Flogging Molly set, about 4 rows of people from the front center of the stage. I gladly relinquished my place there and moved off to the side of the stage (only partly by choice) after the first fast song. As soon as any song picked up, this guy starts flying from side to side, 5 feet in either direction of his original spot in an area where you're lucky to have an inch of space in any direction, plowing over the rest of the people that had been standing there for hours to get a good spot for the bands they wanted to see. It was almost like he was trying to start a mosh pit, except that he WAS the pit. Speaking of mosh pits, on to the next asshole!
Like this, except those garbage cans are people.
2. THE TAZMANIAN DEVIL - So a pit starts up at a show, and everyone is bouncing around in there and having a good time. There's good natured shoving, people that fall get helped up, and the risk of injury is pretty low. Then this asshole spins into the pit, fists flying in all directions. They also seem to travel in groups, and as soon as one hops in three more assholes join him and punch in random directions. At about this time, 80% of the people who had been in the pit having a good time back out, and it's just these assholes that are left. Oddly enough, most of the people that were there in the first place don't enjoy getting punched in the face. But these guys are so hardcore, they don't give a fuck and just keep on flailing, inevitably spinning a fist into someone's face on the edge of the pit who wasn't even trying to be a part of it. Nice job, asshole, you just made that set a lot less enjoyable for a lot of people.
This motherfucker, right here.
1. CROWD SURFERS - I hate these people almost more than words can describe. I came to the show so I could enjoy some music and watch a great band do their thing on stage, not to constantly look back over my shoulder so I can be ready to military press your fat ass. My biggest problem with these selfish, attention whoring assholes is that the people they affect the most are the people that most want to pay attention to the music and enjoy the show - the people who have been waiting around for hours to get a good spot near the stage, front and center. What the fuck is the point, other than the above-mentioned attention whoring and getting your ass touched by a few hundred people? Is it to get a closer view of the band for a few seconds? If that's the case, then join those of us who are interested in actually seeing the band and wait for a good spot before the show. We'll talk about the band and have a great time waiting. It won't be boring, I promise. At least my buddy the human wrecking ball up there was around for a while before the set and earned his view. Also, if you weigh more than 150 lbs, there's no reason you should even consider crowd surfing. I came there to see a show, not get a work-out, and lifting a sweaty, shirtless 230 lbs dude does not fit into that. One of these fuckers pissed me off even more than they usually do at every other concert I've been to. He somehow managed to kick the button-thingy off the top of my brand new hat as I parried his foot away from my face. What. The. Fuck.
See those threads at the top of the hat that I bought 2 days before the concert?
That's where the little button that holds the hat together used to be.