Amazing perspective! I like your tides reference. I often wonder how singular and boring life would be without them, both in nature and inside ourselves. But tides aren't prededictable things forever. They're battered by storms, seasonal upwellings and retreats, the ground beneath them... again, just like you or I. I sense that a pre-meltdown point was in play before you even got over there. It may have to do with a life's history of you constantly being cornered into living up to other's expectations. That's a huge energy, emotional, and personality drain if not reconciled within. To hear how you acutely became so open to the newness of things while there is excitingly encouraging. Perhaps it's been awhile too long since you engaged in some *petty to start, mind you* self indulgences such as a new class or hobby, start writing letters to friends and family instead of a popup text or email blip, wrong time of year for outside gardens but perhaps engage yourself to the needs of some new plants... Where I'm going here is to suggest things where the rewards will be yours and yours alone simply because it's you putting the effort in, and many times the rewards/gratification is fairly instant. Your honest humility and sincerity has, for me at least, been your most attractive trait. My wish tonight is for you to find that peace in your soul, and that it never be robbed by self doubt, or fear that it's not to someone else's liking.
That was wonderful to read. I hope you're feeling ok now you've been back a while. Have to catch up at some point. You have a great eye for photography. What camera were you using?
