i am so sorry, honey. i mean, i am happy that you are in love and are being loved in return. but about the other thing--god, i feel for you. i know how you feel, the conflicting emotions of what you want to and what you have to do. especially when you see that little heart beating. it is the most difficult decision you will ever have to make. just remember, if you need to talk or cry, contact me. i have just the shoulder!