I quit talking til you blogged something new, and less sad, so that's why I've disappeared. Plus if you read MY stuff, you'll see I have been busy and you don't leave comments for me to know that you're at all interested in keeping up communications. so maybe if you are reading them, please do. or i'll just assume what I just stated and that's that. I want to know who my friends are too, and they should take interest. Not all one-sided...i guess this will have to do (as a less sad post):
I'm sorry 'bout your friends hunnie. maybe time to move on and make some new ones.
BUT here's what I have learned:
Friends can be deceptive, and stab you in the back. Proving your whole trust in them, everything you had was a fraud. Leave those people, and never look back. Friends can disappoint you, and friends can talk crap about you when you're not around. But ultimately, if they love you, there will be apologies, fogiveness. If you are there for them at their toughest moments, be there and just be there and expect nothing in return. When they come in and rescue you at your toughest moments, the ones where you're at your lowest, and they try their hardest to offer support, then yes, you can trust you have a best friend. People change, and some aren't going to be lifelong like you expected. But there are so many people in this world, you next best bud might be right around the corner. Just talk to people and understand, that they have struggles too, and sometimes when thier's are too big they get blinded to what you're going through, and they just don't have being the best friend they can be to you high on their priority list, you get crowded out. And maybe at some points, they take shit out on you that you didn't deserve, then get angry and defensive because they don't know how to express the fact that they know they hurt you and they are sorry. But friendship isn't about keeping score, of who did what to whom and how bad it was, no. It is about trust, and sometimes if trust is broken, at those pivitol moments, it is revealed who your REAL friends are. They are the ones who you would let do things to you, you would never accept from you greatest enemies, but you would still forgive them. And we are all out for ourselves ultimately, but really all friendship comes down to is love. and honesty. So ya, you will be tested and you'll be the judge, at the end of things. But that's good, you decide.
Trust yourself. Take care of you first and foremost, the rest will all fall into place.
Like my mother always told me, consider yourself lucky if you find ONE true friend within a life time.. they are a rarity and something to truly charish and you have to go through a lot of crap to find that person..
