The lights went out at work today.
There was nothing we could do.
My assistant manager went to take a nap and so I went and laid down in a middle aisle in the dark with my sweater curled under me as it got colder and colder as the heat we had left escaped. And for the first time in a loooong while I was really doing nothing. Nothing at all. When I'm at home I'm never doing nothing. I am Actively not cleaning, actively not dealing with mail, doing dishes, cooking, returning phone calls what not. It constantly feels bad. Never free. It was so nice to literally have nothing to do and the dark and the liberation of lying down to take a nap in the middle of the store.
I feel like I should have come to some great realization about the direction I want my life to go it. I don't think I did. But I need to do nothing more often. Need to get rid of the constant overwhelmedness somehow - or at least lessen it.
I'm going to go play mario party 5.
peace.
There was nothing we could do.
My assistant manager went to take a nap and so I went and laid down in a middle aisle in the dark with my sweater curled under me as it got colder and colder as the heat we had left escaped. And for the first time in a loooong while I was really doing nothing. Nothing at all. When I'm at home I'm never doing nothing. I am Actively not cleaning, actively not dealing with mail, doing dishes, cooking, returning phone calls what not. It constantly feels bad. Never free. It was so nice to literally have nothing to do and the dark and the liberation of lying down to take a nap in the middle of the store.
I feel like I should have come to some great realization about the direction I want my life to go it. I don't think I did. But I need to do nothing more often. Need to get rid of the constant overwhelmedness somehow - or at least lessen it.
I'm going to go play mario party 5.
peace.
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i was just like the way you described yourself when my father left my mom after 32 years, and called everyone in his family "genetic trash" because he made more money then all of us put together (money that he made in a business that all of us helped him build)
awesome huh?
read The Art of Being by Erich Fromm
it made feel better when i did not want to do anything and felt guilty about it
its ok not to do anything dear