after_monday

I had a visitor today.
The unwelcomed variety.

My ex husband decides to stop by due to him being around the 'hood.
Bduh and the ex do NOT get along what so ever. No matter how much they don't really "know" each other, they still have some weird hate for each other.

There was really nothing I could do. I swallowed my anger and listened to everything he had to tell me :again:.
I smelled the salt pour out of his eyes, I felt the grip of the bare bones of his apology grab ahold of my heart and ring it completely dry. I watched him walk away a defeated man as I fell upon a bed that had been full of so much love not even 2 hours before everything happened.

I took in the scent of the sheets, the sound of a boat rolling past, the taste of my lover still on my fingertips. The feeling of him still gripping my thighs even though he had came long ago.

i pulled at my own hair and grew angry at myself for letting my heart reopen to someone so undeserving. I let him know that i loved him again, that I had never stopped wanting him, but how Brandon just felt better. He really does. Despite all these little barriers he still has crowding around him, I would rather be invited into his world every once in a while then to pick through the rubble of my marriage. Does that make sense?

I am in pieces and no one can put me back together.

Show me a picture that means "love".
Take a new one, show me an old one.. anything.

And I don't mean the love of your pets or children.