Roads Taken, The Here Is Now : The 40 Week 4.4 Round Up/Update [T40W04.4RU/U]
there are days I wonder if I'm where I should be... but then there's the realization that I've never been in a better place in my life.
the roads I've taken, harsh sometimes and painful in others, have led me to here and I while I may wish to change the steps at times, I know it would change the destination - and likely for the worse.
while things aren't perfect, I never asked for perfection.
I'm neither rich nor have money saved, but I not only get by but owe nothing monetarily - bills are paid, a bed and couch are here to sleep on, and food to eat. I even have entertainment, though not as extensive as most people seem to have.
I live a simpler life than many people I know would care for, but it's all I really need.
I have two wonderfully amazing daughters that, while they don't shift and change as often as they did when they were younger, still keep me on my toes and surprise me...
both are creative, in shockingly different ways - one's a bit more physical in her creativity while the other more mentally creative.
one's focused on logic and learning while the other takes great pleasure in the tiniest thing.
I can't wait to see what aspects to their personalities emerge as time progresses, even if they can be aggravating and push my limits... as any child, I'm certain!
( and, no, I am NOT one of those parents who will let them walk over me - I have my rules and there are repercussions to breaking them, even the "small" rules )
I have good employment, having recently taken on more responsibility than I had thought willing, but was convinced I could do so.
no, it's not easy or perfect - hells, I piss at least SOMEone off a week - but if that's what it takes to get the job done, then so be it.
at least it's not the responsibility I had in the past... I have no intention on becoming a manager ever again - but I said that before... and did, so guess I can't gaurantee that one.
I've limited my world in many ways, too - but I still get by.
I may not be "healthy" in the eyes of many, but I'm healthier than I was in the past and that's saying a lot, to be honest!
no vehicle since '99, but I've seldom needed one and couldn't afford one even if I was given one.
no cable, no celphone, and I don't do much (primarily due to distance and affordability) BUT I still enjoy myself and surprise myself, at times
I've only been in 4 relationships in 20yrs, and the years between and since add up to longer than any relationship lasted
but I have good friends, even though the majority of hundreds and hundreds of miles away and I seldom get actual visitors
( this year has been the exception, I've seen more friends this year than in all the years since I moved to the Cities! )
I've lost much in my life - friends and more - and've been in accidents and incidents that even doctors were surprised I survived
but Life is about Living, and I enjoy every day as it is and because there's no gaurantee there'll be a tomorrow
so, it's true that, yes - I AM where I should be... as well as where I want to be (for now, at least)
And I'm happy, though maybe a little too crazily happy for some people
Farethee well for now!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
watched recently :
via netflix/hulu:
High Plains Invaders
Cloned: The Recreator Chronicles
Nightmares In Red White And Blue: The Evolution Of The American Horror Film
The X-Files
Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind
13 Going On 30
ownedflix:
(Stephen King's) The Mist
Mel Brooks' Robin Hood: Men In Tights
The X-Files: Fight The Future
Real Steel
- thom / Wolfox
there are days I wonder if I'm where I should be... but then there's the realization that I've never been in a better place in my life.
the roads I've taken, harsh sometimes and painful in others, have led me to here and I while I may wish to change the steps at times, I know it would change the destination - and likely for the worse.
while things aren't perfect, I never asked for perfection.
I'm neither rich nor have money saved, but I not only get by but owe nothing monetarily - bills are paid, a bed and couch are here to sleep on, and food to eat. I even have entertainment, though not as extensive as most people seem to have.
I live a simpler life than many people I know would care for, but it's all I really need.
I have two wonderfully amazing daughters that, while they don't shift and change as often as they did when they were younger, still keep me on my toes and surprise me...
both are creative, in shockingly different ways - one's a bit more physical in her creativity while the other more mentally creative.
one's focused on logic and learning while the other takes great pleasure in the tiniest thing.
I can't wait to see what aspects to their personalities emerge as time progresses, even if they can be aggravating and push my limits... as any child, I'm certain!
( and, no, I am NOT one of those parents who will let them walk over me - I have my rules and there are repercussions to breaking them, even the "small" rules )
I have good employment, having recently taken on more responsibility than I had thought willing, but was convinced I could do so.
no, it's not easy or perfect - hells, I piss at least SOMEone off a week - but if that's what it takes to get the job done, then so be it.
at least it's not the responsibility I had in the past... I have no intention on becoming a manager ever again - but I said that before... and did, so guess I can't gaurantee that one.
I've limited my world in many ways, too - but I still get by.
I may not be "healthy" in the eyes of many, but I'm healthier than I was in the past and that's saying a lot, to be honest!
no vehicle since '99, but I've seldom needed one and couldn't afford one even if I was given one.
no cable, no celphone, and I don't do much (primarily due to distance and affordability) BUT I still enjoy myself and surprise myself, at times
I've only been in 4 relationships in 20yrs, and the years between and since add up to longer than any relationship lasted
but I have good friends, even though the majority of hundreds and hundreds of miles away and I seldom get actual visitors
( this year has been the exception, I've seen more friends this year than in all the years since I moved to the Cities! )
I've lost much in my life - friends and more - and've been in accidents and incidents that even doctors were surprised I survived
but Life is about Living, and I enjoy every day as it is and because there's no gaurantee there'll be a tomorrow
so, it's true that, yes - I AM where I should be... as well as where I want to be (for now, at least)
And I'm happy, though maybe a little too crazily happy for some people
Farethee well for now!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
watched recently :
via netflix/hulu:
High Plains Invaders
Cloned: The Recreator Chronicles
Nightmares In Red White And Blue: The Evolution Of The American Horror Film
The X-Files
Confessions Of A Dangerous Mind
13 Going On 30
ownedflix:
(Stephen King's) The Mist
Mel Brooks' Robin Hood: Men In Tights
The X-Files: Fight The Future
Real Steel
- thom / Wolfox