(I originally posted this on Facebook and I know I won't get the same kind of replys here since I do not really know anyone but I thought i'd post this anyway).
Title: "The Good, The Band and the Ugly"
" Now let me start off by saying that this note has nothing to do with the film (sorry Brent) but in fact has to do with me at this point in my life here in 2009. I am really glad it is a new year because it signals a new start. And yes....sadly this will be a long read.
I was walking home today after having New Years had a really good friend of mines house. The whole night was spent just playing Rock Band and watching episodes of Arrested Development. The funny thing about that is not in any of the 3 plans that I had for New Years originally was this one of them. If I was my usual self I would have probably gotten really bummed out as I usually do when things do not go my way but you know what. I didn't, I sucked it up and had an amazing time with a great friend and could not have asked for a better New Years. I took what life gave me that night and did not get discouraged. It was the beginning of the new me.
The fact that it is a new year has triggered something in me. As many if not all of you know 2008 may have just been the shittiest year of my life. I felt that everything that could have gone wrong did. I do not want to get into any details though. This note is NOT about my past year being shitty but about how to make this new one a great one. Many days I would spend in my room not wanting to talk to or see anybody. The temper I had as a child returned. I also felt like one of the loneliest people around.
Now that 2009 is here though I want a fresh start. The past year has made me feel like something is missing. I still have not found what that is but I am not going to wait until it finds me. To find this though I need help from my friends. I have things to work on but do not exactly know what that all is yet. So what I want from you guys is to help identify myself. If someone would mention Mike Marlatt to you what would you think? What are my good qualities? What are my bad? I cannot change if I do not know what is wrong. I also ask that you guys put some thought into this...I do not really want to hear that I'm "metal" (because being such does not exist) or that I'm a "movie guy". I need answers deeper then that. I've identified myself with my hobbies for far too long. If you feel you do not know me enough then feel free not to answer...but send me a message anyway and maybe we can catch up. If you do not feel comfortable answering or replying in this note then feel free to just send me a message. I promise I will be the only one who reads this.
I have some advice. This is more for the younger people I talk to because I am sure a lot of the older ones have this figured out but just in case they should read anyway. Life is going to deal you some really shitty hands. These hands that are given to you are not what makes life bad or good. It's your reactions that predetermine your next hand. If you are just going to sit in your room and never go out to experience life then shit is just going to build. Sadly this year I was blind to this and let it get to me but I say fuck it. You only get as much in life as you are willing to put in.
So in closing what I want to say is for every girl I fell too quickly for and put in uncomfortable situations, to every friend I may have angered over something extremely trivial, to every friendship I have neglected or taken advantage of I am sorry. 2008 has not been the real me. Stick around long enough and I'm sure you'll see Mike (he is still cynical but not so pessimistic). And to every family member, friend, and acquaintance who has not become my friend yet I just want to say thank you and that I would not want any of you out of my life for any reason at all. I know that it will not be some quick fix. There will be days where I am still extremely depressed. I just know that I'll never be alone...Though I may need some reminders every once in a while. Well I now open the floor to each and every one of you."
Title: "The Good, The Band and the Ugly"
" Now let me start off by saying that this note has nothing to do with the film (sorry Brent) but in fact has to do with me at this point in my life here in 2009. I am really glad it is a new year because it signals a new start. And yes....sadly this will be a long read.
I was walking home today after having New Years had a really good friend of mines house. The whole night was spent just playing Rock Band and watching episodes of Arrested Development. The funny thing about that is not in any of the 3 plans that I had for New Years originally was this one of them. If I was my usual self I would have probably gotten really bummed out as I usually do when things do not go my way but you know what. I didn't, I sucked it up and had an amazing time with a great friend and could not have asked for a better New Years. I took what life gave me that night and did not get discouraged. It was the beginning of the new me.
The fact that it is a new year has triggered something in me. As many if not all of you know 2008 may have just been the shittiest year of my life. I felt that everything that could have gone wrong did. I do not want to get into any details though. This note is NOT about my past year being shitty but about how to make this new one a great one. Many days I would spend in my room not wanting to talk to or see anybody. The temper I had as a child returned. I also felt like one of the loneliest people around.
Now that 2009 is here though I want a fresh start. The past year has made me feel like something is missing. I still have not found what that is but I am not going to wait until it finds me. To find this though I need help from my friends. I have things to work on but do not exactly know what that all is yet. So what I want from you guys is to help identify myself. If someone would mention Mike Marlatt to you what would you think? What are my good qualities? What are my bad? I cannot change if I do not know what is wrong. I also ask that you guys put some thought into this...I do not really want to hear that I'm "metal" (because being such does not exist) or that I'm a "movie guy". I need answers deeper then that. I've identified myself with my hobbies for far too long. If you feel you do not know me enough then feel free not to answer...but send me a message anyway and maybe we can catch up. If you do not feel comfortable answering or replying in this note then feel free to just send me a message. I promise I will be the only one who reads this.
I have some advice. This is more for the younger people I talk to because I am sure a lot of the older ones have this figured out but just in case they should read anyway. Life is going to deal you some really shitty hands. These hands that are given to you are not what makes life bad or good. It's your reactions that predetermine your next hand. If you are just going to sit in your room and never go out to experience life then shit is just going to build. Sadly this year I was blind to this and let it get to me but I say fuck it. You only get as much in life as you are willing to put in.
So in closing what I want to say is for every girl I fell too quickly for and put in uncomfortable situations, to every friend I may have angered over something extremely trivial, to every friendship I have neglected or taken advantage of I am sorry. 2008 has not been the real me. Stick around long enough and I'm sure you'll see Mike (he is still cynical but not so pessimistic). And to every family member, friend, and acquaintance who has not become my friend yet I just want to say thank you and that I would not want any of you out of my life for any reason at all. I know that it will not be some quick fix. There will be days where I am still extremely depressed. I just know that I'll never be alone...Though I may need some reminders every once in a while. Well I now open the floor to each and every one of you."