What do i want for 2017? So much has gone on tbis past year and i see very little hope for the next year with everything going on with my community, the country, and the world. I want to stay optimistic, so I was thinking of what i would like to see for 2017.
I wish my mother to find happiness and sobriety. So has been drinking for far to long, longer than i care to remember, but i know its been over 30 years that i can think of. Once when i was 14, she called me from the bar and asked me to come pick her up because her date was not willing to bring her home. Her drinking has been such a huge part of her life and seeing her like she is makes me realize a little of the scope of her problem. She has no direction, no motivation, no desire anymore and it breaks my heart.
I hope that i get my health in order. In truth, i have not had an episode to put me in the hospital since the end of September when i went 12 days with no solid food and throwing up. But i know in reality, i am just playing with house money at this point. My daily foid consists of a protien shake in the morning, two powerades while at work, and then a dinner. I am not eating hardly anything at all because of my stomach issues and diabetes, and that needs to change.
I hope that i can find peace within myself about relationships, work, health, and actually develop beyond my social awkwardnesd. I hope i can find some self worth in these areas and stop feeling like i am not good enough in them. I need to feel good about me to be good for anyone else.
I hope i find someplace i can call my forever home. In truth i hate florida. Everything here just grinds at my very core. People call it laid back, i call it lazy. I am the only one who comes into work on time. On average, people are 10 minutes late. Some as much as an hour. Going out to eat, there is no good customer service. Drivers are rude. Even hired help comes and goes at their leisure, not yours. I wish to be back in Europe. Germany, France, UK... somewhere other than here.
I dont need wealth. I need peace of mind, heart and soul. Thats my deepest wish gor the new year