Last night someone brought up one of my little crazies, I hate seeing old people eat chicken off the bone. My sleep was haunted by images of very elderly people eating chicken off the bone, stark, black and white, backlit images from a low perspective. I think it was even in slow motion, like the fight scenes in 'Raging Bull'. It might take me a...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
adelina:
even if the hands belonged to someone who drove nine and a half hours to see you?
frankly:
he's giving me a web cam. thanks for the suggestion!
I've been almost a week in hell. South Florida hell. Atleast yesterday I was able to move to a hotel in South Beach and see normal people again. I've got to go to the airport now.
hotcurry:
I hate Florida. It's the last place I would want to be... and I grew up in Jersey, so that's really saying something.
I hate Florida. It's the last place I would want to be... and I grew up in Jersey, so that's really saying something. 
missmuffet:
WELCOME BACK!
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
charlize:
Thats so cute! Your niece seems adorable!
photomares:
it could have been a SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS card and then what! 
Just found out I'm leaving for Miami. In the past whenever we've flown across country to avoid rain, it seems to rain wherever we end up and California gets beautiful weather. Wish me luck.
photomares:
Maimi?................................are you on a secret mission? 
Do you ever feel like you've run out of words? Like you want to say something, but there's nothing to say?
VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
hotcurry:
I pitch jokes.
hotcurry:
yeah, but they feed us, so it's not all bad.
I didn't do anything I had planned to do today, but I did do some things I hadn't planned on doing and I know it's for the best. I've gone through boxes of photographs I've taken and thrown a lot of crap away. I made some phone calls to some potential clients and those seemed to go well. Four people I hadn't talked to in...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
loretta:
Probobly 
Thanks though.
Seems like you had a good day
Nice.
I didn't do anything I had plans to do either but, but I also didn't do anything else.
Well except the piercing.
After that I was to tired for anything else. Being nervous and then the adrenalin really makes one tired.
Also i was up early.
kisses
Thanks though.
Seems like you had a good day
Nice.
I didn't do anything I had plans to do either but, but I also didn't do anything else.
Well except the piercing.
After that I was to tired for anything else. Being nervous and then the adrenalin really makes one tired.
Also i was up early.
kisses
charlize:
I love hearing about your friend's laughter. It reminds me so much of what people used to say about me. Before all this medical stuff happened I swear I was a different person. I can't figure out why this would have changed me; probably not permenant though. Do you like this Anca???
Thanks for the advice. I will ask the hospital about that stuff. The hospital has thus far not been very helpful at all. When I called the billing office the woman I spoke with was very bitchy. She told me the most stretched out she could make my payments was over four months. I still can't even come close to affording that. I figure in order to pay all the bills I need about $600 to $800 a month. That's if I am supposed to make four payments. I wanted to cry when I got off the phone. I kept hearing that hospitals are nice so I was dumbstruck by how rude this lady was. I felt totally defeated and started to panic about how I am going to find money for this. Three surgeries is a lot to pay for, even with insurance. Plus, after my second surgery I rode in an ambulance to the emergency room. I was told insurance would not pay for this, but luckily they paid for about $600 - the bill was $750 or something close. I don't want to dance, so I am going to desperately try to find employment as a waitress. I have no experience in this area, but I know I would be really good at it. Wish me luck. If I can't then I will probably resort to stripping. I don't want to be in debt when I leave for school. I don't think I have said anything about that...but I am leaving in about six months. I really need to be as debt free as possible. Plus, I need to get something fixed on my car too so I can sell it before I go. Okay enough about that.
Oh, and I am flattered that you would duck some bills in my g-string. That's awesome! 
Thanks for the advice. I will ask the hospital about that stuff. The hospital has thus far not been very helpful at all. When I called the billing office the woman I spoke with was very bitchy. She told me the most stretched out she could make my payments was over four months. I still can't even come close to affording that. I figure in order to pay all the bills I need about $600 to $800 a month. That's if I am supposed to make four payments. I wanted to cry when I got off the phone. I kept hearing that hospitals are nice so I was dumbstruck by how rude this lady was. I felt totally defeated and started to panic about how I am going to find money for this. Three surgeries is a lot to pay for, even with insurance. Plus, after my second surgery I rode in an ambulance to the emergency room. I was told insurance would not pay for this, but luckily they paid for about $600 - the bill was $750 or something close. I don't want to dance, so I am going to desperately try to find employment as a waitress. I have no experience in this area, but I know I would be really good at it. Wish me luck. If I can't then I will probably resort to stripping. I don't want to be in debt when I leave for school. I don't think I have said anything about that...but I am leaving in about six months. I really need to be as debt free as possible. Plus, I need to get something fixed on my car too so I can sell it before I go. Okay enough about that.
Oh, and I am flattered that you would duck some bills in my g-string. That's awesome!
Another day. I woke up, as expected. The sun is up, es expected. Where is the unexpected? Somebody throw me a curve
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
loretta:
They must've felt the bad energy..
chiclet:
Oh goodness. I'm not sure that we'd be snack buddies. But, I must admit, I have yet to eat a beignet.
My friends have been telling me, but now I see it, I'm like a lizard or a bird in the claws of a cat. I'm batted around and coddled, injured but not dead, just messed up enough so I can't get away, but left with enough fight to flop around and give the cat whatever sick pleasure it desires.
Two weeks ago 'the cat' and...
Read More
Two weeks ago 'the cat' and...
Read More
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
frankly:
oh god, i hear you. went to new york. 4 fantastic days. well.... didn't see anything. no music, no art, nothing i would usually do. just drinking. lots of it, sex, more than lots of it, and a bit of food. and then, last night, a fight. a misunderstanding. was just one off weekend. oh, my bloody, wounded heart. i never fall for that shit. what was wrong with me? i guess i too am a lizard, and the cat spat me out. now i'm here, in my small town. hating it. and hating my missed opportunities, all wasted because of spending time with someone who was taking advantage of me. didn't shoot the set. couldn't tear myself away. so fucking unlike me!!!
charlize:
That's sad. I am sorry sweetie! I hope you feel better. That sounds like no fun at all! Relationships suck. I often keep myself from having them because heartache is the worst pain a person can endure. And is it worth it? I ask that all the time. Is it worth it?
I hope you feel better. That sounds like no fun at all! Relationships suck. I often keep myself from having them because heartache is the worst pain a person can endure. And is it worth it? I ask that all the time. Is it worth it?I've got this friend who has a habit of being where horrible things are happening but always seems to come through without a scratch. He was in Kabul when the war started and his whole attitude was "I'm not gonna let a few bombs and terrorists ruin my vacation". What makes it even more amazing is he stands out in a crowd, everywhere, he's about...
Read More
Read More
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
frankly:
i always enjoy reading your journal. you are an excellent writer, and you always have something interesting to say.
ash:
yeah what that guy said
I love the way Russian girls say 'pussy'.
'Pooh-see'. I love that.
I once photographed a new model who was very pretty but very quiet and shy, she said maybe four or five words the whole day. A week later her agency asked me to shoot her again. When she showed up she said ,"you made me look so good I wanted to lick my...
Read More
'Pooh-see'. I love that.
I once photographed a new model who was very pretty but very quiet and shy, she said maybe four or five words the whole day. A week later her agency asked me to shoot her again. When she showed up she said ,"you made me look so good I wanted to lick my...
Read More
VIEW 13 of 13 COMMENTS
loretta:
his name is Jiji. And he's the cutest kittie ever!!!!!! 
hotcurry:
Haha! I do.