Age: 20
Location: Currently in Seattle Washington but in about a week I'm moving to Columbia South Carolina
Occupation: Student of life and eventually Law School
Describe yourself to us in a paragraph. Your hobbies, interests, things like that:
I'm Zach, and I'm random as hell. I frequently get lonely because I'm too damn awkward in real life to keep friends. I love waxing philosophic. I'm intelligent enough to entertain trains of thought I don't necessarily agree with, and frequently do so much to the chagrin of those trying to seriously debate me. In high school, I got in trouble for writing a paper advocating the banning of LifeAlert system, arguing that if someone falls and cannot get up, and lay there for the several days it would take to die, and NOT A SOUL comes to see them in that time, then their lives are entirely too lonely and pointless and they should just die anyway.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE?
Color: Red, Black, and red. If I must pick a single color, then I pick red.
Book: A toss up between The Stand, by Steven King, and Crime and Punishment, by Dostoevsky.
Movie: Interstellar 5555, but I also really like Adaptation and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Show: I don't watch television, but my friend downloaded Big Bang Theory a few months ago and I loved that, so, that would be it.
Band/Musician: So hard to choose. I suppose this local band called Ramona Come Closer.
Song: Dry Your Eyes, by the Streets
Artist: Sarah Reece, a friend from high school
Food: Baked Macaroni and Cheese. OMG. So good.
Word: Cooter. It makes me giggle.
Number: 19
Day of The Week: Yesterday, because it is with fondest memory that we do recall, compared to the critiquing eye of today and the pessimistic hope of tomorrow.
Item of Clothing: I love a good pair of comfortable underwear.
QUESTIONS
Please pick 3 of your favourites and explain why they are your favourites in 4-5 sentences.
I kind of went through and did that for some of them, but I'll expound on them some more.
I picked Dry Your Eyes because lately, I can't stop listening to it. It's quite catchy. Also about breaking up, or more accurately, getting broken up with, a situation I am intimately aware of. It's good, you should listen to it.
I picked Baked Macaroni and Cheese because I'm not nearly as adult as my age might lead you to believe, but I'm forced to pretend, so if I addend "baked" to the ever delicious macaroni and cheese, it seems slightly more grown up. I used to love macaroni and cheese with hot dogs sliced up inside of it. That reminds me of a dream I had last night where I bought hot dogs for my family at a football game stadium, but wound up eating them all since apparently neither of the people I was with enjoys mustard. Their loss. Damn, I want a hot dog.
Big Bang Theory is my favorite because it's damn funny. It's such a nerdy show about nerds, except the girl who plays Penny (Kiley Cuoco or something like that) is a total fox. Though she cannot act a drunk girl at alll. It's sort of a personal thing to with me since my friend who introduced me to the show is in jail now so it's like a way to keep in contact, kind of, since we can't have contact for real.
If your house was on fire, and you could only bring 3 things out, what would you bring and why?
I'd grab my laptop, wallet, and cell phone. Anything else that burns is easily replaced, and with those three things it's much easier to start over. Plus I've got a vast /b/ folder that I wouldn't want to replace again. Pretty boring answers, I know, but that's totally the truth.
Tell us something embarrassing you've done.
Oh man, I'm like the most awkward guy for some reason, and I have this thing about intimacy, and I was inebriated and making out with this girl and she asked if I wanted to have sex and I panicked so I made a dumb excuse for not and then I got dressed and stumbled home. It was terribly embarrassing.
What's the most exciting thing that you've done or the most exciting thing that's happened to you in your life, and why?
I suppossse for most people reading about my life, it would be enlisting in the Air Force, graduating Basic Training, and then getting kicked the fuck out for being too neurotic, just because it's such an epic adventure that changes most people and most other people don't even attempt it. But silly old me would say falling in love is the most exciting thing to happen to me and its happened three times total. Hopefully this one is good too, you know?
Who do you look up to, and why?
Hardly anyone. I'm such a cynic that it's hard for me to respect or idolize anyone. I'm racking my brain. OH. Web comic authors. I love that they make me laugh and make a living off it. Jeph Jacques of Questionable Content fame. Ryan North of Dinosaur Comics. Kate Beaton of Hark! A Vagrant. They're so awesome, and they talk to me on twitter!
If you could have one superpower for a day, what would it be and why?
Telepathy. It'd be so easy to get what I wanted from people if I could read their minds and talk to them in their own head. I'd have so much fun Imagine a telepath who is tripping on mind altering drugs! Imagine the ramifications!
What are your aspirations in life, what would you like to do and where would you like to go?
I've never really had serious aspirations, which is terrible! It's made my life kind of pointless and empty. But I'm working towards being a lawyer, because I love to debate, and I love how, through the power of argument, you can bend the law to almost any way you want to, and if you're powerful enough of a persuader, you will win your case.
Is there anyone you hate, and if so, why do you hate them?
I have a general disdain for most people, because I'm incredibly judgmental and hypocritical. I hate crowds and I don't like teenage mallrats. But I don't really hate them, more just like, spurn them. But I have friends who are teenage mallrats, so it's not like a serious hate.
Who would you give a kidney to?
The highest bidder. I'm poor folks, I need ze monies.
What do you think is the most interesting thing about you?
I'm hyper intelligent and totally random. It's really fun and I can talk for hours about anything.
What is your favourite picture of you, and why?
I really like this picture because it's playful, and I like the smirk on my face, and the tie is awesome, and you can't tell because it's cropped but I'm nekked
Pick something that you feel strongly about, write about it, explaining to us how you feel about it and why. (1 or 2 paragraphs):
I cannot stand Insane Clown Posse. I do not respect them as musical "artists" and I cannot understand why people listen to them with such a religious fervor. They have this whole cult following of juggalos and juggalettes or whatever and I think it's the dumbest thing in the whole world. What's worse is the violence this cult expresses to anyone who doesn't like their music. I think ICP sucks, and I've gotten jumped for expressing that. I'm not usually friends with people who are like that, just because I find it soooo dumb. I mean, it might be because I just don't understand such fanatical worship of shitty music and maybe that'smy fault for not being more open minded, but. I just can't get it.