Ok, Ok, I'm here again. I really want to post something of value for your reading attention, but I just can't deny how I"m feeling........
I feel so beaten, so totally thrashed and smashed from this world. I feel totally exhausted by the amount of anger and rage people project in the world. I'm really not able to deal with everyone's pent up rage being flung at me when I am in such a clear and tender space. It's too fuckin' much. I really wish people would take responsibility for their emotions and process stuff. I really want everyone to be happy and just get along, to treat each other with respect and kindness. Is that really setting the goal too high? I don't think so, but I am constantly amazed at how even amongst my friends who are supposedly loving people, I am treated like shit. It's just too much sometimes........
It really makes me wonder why I even care, even bother to open my heart and make a difference. I dunno, I don't want you to cry me a river or anything,
but I just can't help feeling like it's pointless. I sometimes wish I could forget all the beautiful truths I have witnessed and just be blissfully ignorant, but NO, too late for that, I know what we are, and I can't help but care about this world. I guess it would feel nice to be cared for in return, to be treated like a person, not an emotional/psychic puching bag..........
Such is the way sometimes
I feel so beaten, so totally thrashed and smashed from this world. I feel totally exhausted by the amount of anger and rage people project in the world. I'm really not able to deal with everyone's pent up rage being flung at me when I am in such a clear and tender space. It's too fuckin' much. I really wish people would take responsibility for their emotions and process stuff. I really want everyone to be happy and just get along, to treat each other with respect and kindness. Is that really setting the goal too high? I don't think so, but I am constantly amazed at how even amongst my friends who are supposedly loving people, I am treated like shit. It's just too much sometimes........
It really makes me wonder why I even care, even bother to open my heart and make a difference. I dunno, I don't want you to cry me a river or anything,
but I just can't help feeling like it's pointless. I sometimes wish I could forget all the beautiful truths I have witnessed and just be blissfully ignorant, but NO, too late for that, I know what we are, and I can't help but care about this world. I guess it would feel nice to be cared for in return, to be treated like a person, not an emotional/psychic puching bag..........
Such is the way sometimes
I'm not sure if this is the sort of thing you want to hear, but in my experience, especially if this is happening repeatedly that it might be something of a test. The times where I have had loved ones wailing on me emotionally were the times where there was something I was failing to see or to do. Sometimes it took me years to sort out what that was, if I was being particularly dense and stubborn.