Sooooooooooo, I didn't finish Black Ops on Veteran, but I will. It's just gonna take some time because it's fucking hard! I was gonna watch Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist tonight for, like, the 47th time. Mainly because it's fucking awesome, but also because Michael Cera is a legend. But I opened my DVD cupboard and Kick Ass was there just staring at me, so I watched that instead.
Watching it made me think of what sort of superhero would I be? Would I have powers like Superman or just be minted enough to buy amazing gadgets like Batman. Now, when it comes to the question of who is the greatest superhero, I can never decide between the aforementioned two. Both guys have their flaws and strengths. Superman has a gay costume, but can fly. He can fucking fly people! Batman has the Batmobile, but he is obsessed with dirty, rabies carrying flying monsters of the night. See what I mean? It's difficult. It is a question my humble little brain isn't well equipped enough to answer. If I was a superhero I would want a special power, and this special power would be invisibility. You could arrive at the crime scene, take care of the baddies before they even know you're there and take off before the rozzers arrive. Being this efficient would leave you so much time to dick. Randomly touch people in the street to freak them out, convince Whoppi Goldberg that you're a dead man wanting to talk to his wife from beyond the grave, sneak into the ladies changing room at the gym...........I could go on.
Being invisible also removes the impracticalities of wearing the required superhero suit because you could be the naked superhero, you would just need to fight crime somewhere warm or things may shrink. You wouldn't have to wear your suit under your regular clothes because I imagine this would be rather uncomfortable and you would have to buy clothes one size too big to fit your suit under. This can't be good for your self-esteem. Also, of all the superhero suits I have seen, none of them have a zip or a fly. Which would make going for a piss a right pain in the arse. You would have to take your whole suit off down to your waist, it can't be easy to take off as it's bloody tight, then you've got to struggle to put it back on AND you would have to ask a passer-by to do the zip up. Not professional at all. So that's who I would be, Naked Invisible Man.
I would be somewhere between this:
and this:
Word.
Watching it made me think of what sort of superhero would I be? Would I have powers like Superman or just be minted enough to buy amazing gadgets like Batman. Now, when it comes to the question of who is the greatest superhero, I can never decide between the aforementioned two. Both guys have their flaws and strengths. Superman has a gay costume, but can fly. He can fucking fly people! Batman has the Batmobile, but he is obsessed with dirty, rabies carrying flying monsters of the night. See what I mean? It's difficult. It is a question my humble little brain isn't well equipped enough to answer. If I was a superhero I would want a special power, and this special power would be invisibility. You could arrive at the crime scene, take care of the baddies before they even know you're there and take off before the rozzers arrive. Being this efficient would leave you so much time to dick. Randomly touch people in the street to freak them out, convince Whoppi Goldberg that you're a dead man wanting to talk to his wife from beyond the grave, sneak into the ladies changing room at the gym...........I could go on.
Being invisible also removes the impracticalities of wearing the required superhero suit because you could be the naked superhero, you would just need to fight crime somewhere warm or things may shrink. You wouldn't have to wear your suit under your regular clothes because I imagine this would be rather uncomfortable and you would have to buy clothes one size too big to fit your suit under. This can't be good for your self-esteem. Also, of all the superhero suits I have seen, none of them have a zip or a fly. Which would make going for a piss a right pain in the arse. You would have to take your whole suit off down to your waist, it can't be easy to take off as it's bloody tight, then you've got to struggle to put it back on AND you would have to ask a passer-by to do the zip up. Not professional at all. So that's who I would be, Naked Invisible Man.
I would be somewhere between this:
and this:
Word.
skyerocket:
Very well thought out.
skyerocket:
I wish it bloody was pimms o' clock! I could just go for some of that. Unfortunatley only red wine is available...It'll do!