fatdavid8

Dear SG Friends,

Please excuse my recent lack of journal updates. I haven't been able to access the Web because my PC recently had some sort of problem with one of its system configuration files that it refused to allow me to fix (even though I followed MS's instructions step by step) and then, because of my Scottish heritage, received a vicious kickin' that took...
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First, let me offer my apologies to all regarding the laxness with which I've been updating. As I may have mentioned a while ago, I just received tenure this summer, so after six years of working like a mad fool, I am taking some time to travel a bit and relax like an exhausted one.

Second, allow me to relate a small story: Over the...
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This past Memorial Day weekend, my wife, M.F., and I drove across several states to visit my father and his fiance in their new manse by a lake. Along the way, and at his suggestion, we picked up my father's mother, Weezie, and her "boyfriend", Ol' Willie. They're both in their mid-eighties, so he thought it best that they not drive several hours on the...
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Targeted advertising on the Web appears to have reached the point of insanity.

I recently looked up the word "wreak" on dictionary.com because Attila, my college's dean, constantly pronounces it just like "wreck", and I was pretty certain that it was pronounced like "reek".

It turned out that I was correct and that Attila was wrong, but that wasn't the interesting thing: oddly enough, the...
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To open, I feel as though I ought to apologize to the few readers of this journal (especially to those of you who must read it as a condition of your parole): one entry for the whole of the month April is disgracefully lax. My only excuse is that we received our week-and-a-half's worth of pleasant Spring weather last month, and I didn't want to...
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Well, I'm starting to think that I should pop a tranquilizer dart in my wife MausFrau's ass, a la Jim from Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom, and release her into a double-entendre-free preserve for her own good. She recently had the following exchange with an old college pal and computer geek, IS_G:

MausFrau: Hi, G. How's it going?

IS_G: Good. How was...
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This evening, while we were on our way from work, my wife, M.F., and I were discussing what we wanted to do for the evening (i.e., do some recreational shopping and then eat some beer and pizza while our alma mater played in the Sweet 16), when I asked her how her doctor's appointment earlier in the day had gone (she's had some stomach trouble...
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My wife, M.F., is out of town on a trip this weekend, so I've been "batching" it (i.e., slang for "bacheloring", I think), while keeping an eye on my feline females, Fishfork and Birdcup, and a colleague's dog, Susie Sue.

I've done a bit of observing not real fieldwork, you understand, but just a bit of interested observing and I've noticed that, within the current...
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While heading to the airport to return from our vacation trip to Mexico, MausFrau (my tiny wife who lives in a shoe) and I shared a taxi-van with a family from Cleveland. I had a bit of the sort of desultory and dispirited chit-chat that one tends to have with strangers at the end of a trip with the father of the family:

Cincinnatus:...
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Well, FatDavid8 has just returned from his trip to Cancun and is still, unfortunately, referring to himself in the third person.

Pursuant to his prior entry: FatD's attempt while in Cancun to have sex with the dolphins was, shall we say, less than successful, but he did learn two things:

One, they likes the anal gangbangs with the whiteboys down in Mexican prisons just as...
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