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1. As *nsync would say, God must have spent a little more time on you. What, exactly, did God spend more time on?
Well then God only knows. He probably spent more time on me becasue he was watching the TV whilst making me.
2. If you had to start your own war against something, what would it be and why? Also, what would the protestors do in protest, to show they think your war is evil?
I would start a war on EmoKids. I hate EmoKids. The way that they wear all them trendy clothes, and the way that they comb their stupid hair over one eye like that. Just plain hate it. I think only EmoKids would care that I'd started a war on them, so all my protesters would be EmoKids. They would pobably just sit about and cry in protest.
3. In the movie of your life, who would play you and who would play your lover?
If there was a movie being made of my life I would play myself, a-la Howard Stern in the movie "Private Parts". Becasue I think I'd be the only good me. I dunno who would play my lover though. I'd like to suggest a different woman for every sex scene (hopefully there would be plenty), so that I could see lots of them naked!
4. What flavor of diet coke do you next want?
One that doesn't smell like cat's pee. Wait a minute......is that speed....? I dunno.
5. Insert picture of what you think is the best hair ever.
Thank it suits me?
6. If girls had penises and boys had vaginas, who would you date/fuck?
Would the girls still have boobs, or would they be the boy's? I dunno. See i like the vagina, and the boobs, I like them together. I'm a man of tradition.
7. Have you ever farted in public? if so, what were the circumstances?
I fart all the time. One time I let one go in a shop just as the song finished. So i was pushing it out to make a good noise, but then it went all silent as the song finished, but I was past the point of no return. It ripped like Jack the Ripper and everyone turned round and looked. Was a peach! Smelled like death as well.
8. Tell one crazy I cant believe how drunk I was story.
I've not really got any really good stories.
One time I was drunk and passed out in my mum and dad's bed with their nice white linen sheets. When i woke up I was, and their bed was, covered in this weird green and black sick. It smelled for days. I was totally wrecked that night. Had been drinking Lager, Guinness, Cider, and then a bottle of Tequila I found in the kitchen. Me and my mate Dave were Mixing the Tequila with the Lager. Wasn't nice, but drank it anyways. Terrible.
9. Ideal Christmas stocking?
One that a really hot chick was wearing. Hopefully red. With a little Santa Claus sewn onto it.
10. Who is Britney Spears soul mate?
I don't know that. I don't even know who my own soul mate is. Probably someone as dumb as she is. Someone like David Spade. Hes a complete twatt.
11. What is the one book you think everyone should read?
Cash by Johnny Cash.
12. At your heaviest, how much did you weigh?
Probably about 10 stone. I have a really fast metabolism, and if i miss out breakfast one day then I get skinnier. Its just my genetics I suppose. Pain in the tits tho.
13. Ever puked and run? Tell us your story.
I threw up in a neighbours garden one time all over her plants. Didn't run though. It was about 4 in the morning and I kind of staggered away.
14. Tell one too tired to finish masturbating story, then join our club.
I'm either too tired to start masturbating, or I go ahaead and finished it. Never been in the middle. A couple of times, usually when I've been drunk, I've been too tired to finish having sex. Can't remember any stories about it though. I must've fallen asleep.
15. Write down three true facts, and one lie. Don't tell us which one is the lie (y'all have to guess)
1) I still live with my parents
2) I'm a police officer
3) I own a Lambourgini
4) I lost my virginity when I was 17 (late starter)
16. Insert your favorite cute/cuddly picture (just to make us smile).
Sid, my cockatiel.
17. If you cooked a dinner for someone you were head over heels in love with, what would you cook?
I made my girlfriend Cheesy Beanos the other day.
18. If you had to write something on your forehead and walk around with it all day, what would it be?
Probably just my name "Ben".
19. What is your favorite piece of art, and would you please post a picture of it below?
American Gothis, By Grant Wood
20. Would you have sex with Xena, Warrior Princess? What would it be like? Also, if you said no, are you crazy? What are your reasons for declining?
I wouldn't. She would totally crush me and she is a real man woman. She looks like a drag queen, and that look just doesn't pump my nads.
21. Whats your favorite animal? show us.
He's the one and only.
22. If you were a color, what color would you be? Why?
I would be a nice purple, becasue its nice and bright but also kinda dark. A happy medium.
23. What turns you on? If it invovles a ball gag, please describe.
I like boobies. And vaginas. Women in general turn me on. i dunno what else. Its cool to see a chick touch herself as well. Never even tried a ball gag. Not really tried too many sex toys at all actually.
24. On a scale of 1 to 10, how dumb is it to decline the above question by answering 'that's too personal' ?
I'd give it an 8. Some people are just really inhibited. Give them a beer and then see what thay say.
25. Why are ball gags sexy?
umm....
Q: Did you hear about the 150-pound man who had 75-pound testicles?
A: He was half nuts.
Did you find that sexy?
26. Do you have any personal opinions on ice trays?
Ice Trays are good. Its nice to have a cold drink. Dont have any problem with them.
27. What's the most painful thing you've ever had done to you/done to another person during sex?
One time just at the start of sex where the foreplay was skipped I went to put it in, but it wasnt moist enough and the "banjo string" on my willy snapped. Was quite sore and there was a lot of blood. Enough said.
28. If you had to be stranded for the rest of your life on a desert island and pick one person to go with you, would you pick someone you could really talk to or someone who gave you the best sex of your life? If you say both, youre a fucking whore.
I think I'd go for someone who I could really talk to. You can only have sex for so long before your dick goes red raw and you need a rest. But if there was someone who you could really talk to that would be better becasue you'd be able to talk to them for the majority of the day. Plus if it was the best sex of your life for the rest of your life then pretty soon it would just be the regular normal sex. I'm quite a chatty persom as well. I need conversation.
29. What is the biggest insult someone could tell you?
Nothing really offends me anymore. I've had every insult and threat imaginable thrown at me. So I just brush it all off now.
30. If you were/are a big dyke, would you wear the strap on or would your partner?
I think we'd have to take turns. I like to think I'm a considerate lover, and for one person to wear the strap on that mean the only one person would be getting the pleasure (I'd imagine). So turns about would be the only fair way i think.
Sorry I'm not the most interesting person.
Ben
x
1. As *nsync would say, God must have spent a little more time on you. What, exactly, did God spend more time on?
Well then God only knows. He probably spent more time on me becasue he was watching the TV whilst making me.
2. If you had to start your own war against something, what would it be and why? Also, what would the protestors do in protest, to show they think your war is evil?
I would start a war on EmoKids. I hate EmoKids. The way that they wear all them trendy clothes, and the way that they comb their stupid hair over one eye like that. Just plain hate it. I think only EmoKids would care that I'd started a war on them, so all my protesters would be EmoKids. They would pobably just sit about and cry in protest.
3. In the movie of your life, who would play you and who would play your lover?
If there was a movie being made of my life I would play myself, a-la Howard Stern in the movie "Private Parts". Becasue I think I'd be the only good me. I dunno who would play my lover though. I'd like to suggest a different woman for every sex scene (hopefully there would be plenty), so that I could see lots of them naked!
4. What flavor of diet coke do you next want?
One that doesn't smell like cat's pee. Wait a minute......is that speed....? I dunno.
5. Insert picture of what you think is the best hair ever.
Thank it suits me?
6. If girls had penises and boys had vaginas, who would you date/fuck?
Would the girls still have boobs, or would they be the boy's? I dunno. See i like the vagina, and the boobs, I like them together. I'm a man of tradition.
7. Have you ever farted in public? if so, what were the circumstances?
I fart all the time. One time I let one go in a shop just as the song finished. So i was pushing it out to make a good noise, but then it went all silent as the song finished, but I was past the point of no return. It ripped like Jack the Ripper and everyone turned round and looked. Was a peach! Smelled like death as well.
8. Tell one crazy I cant believe how drunk I was story.
I've not really got any really good stories.
One time I was drunk and passed out in my mum and dad's bed with their nice white linen sheets. When i woke up I was, and their bed was, covered in this weird green and black sick. It smelled for days. I was totally wrecked that night. Had been drinking Lager, Guinness, Cider, and then a bottle of Tequila I found in the kitchen. Me and my mate Dave were Mixing the Tequila with the Lager. Wasn't nice, but drank it anyways. Terrible.
9. Ideal Christmas stocking?
One that a really hot chick was wearing. Hopefully red. With a little Santa Claus sewn onto it.
10. Who is Britney Spears soul mate?
I don't know that. I don't even know who my own soul mate is. Probably someone as dumb as she is. Someone like David Spade. Hes a complete twatt.
11. What is the one book you think everyone should read?
Cash by Johnny Cash.
12. At your heaviest, how much did you weigh?
Probably about 10 stone. I have a really fast metabolism, and if i miss out breakfast one day then I get skinnier. Its just my genetics I suppose. Pain in the tits tho.
13. Ever puked and run? Tell us your story.
I threw up in a neighbours garden one time all over her plants. Didn't run though. It was about 4 in the morning and I kind of staggered away.
14. Tell one too tired to finish masturbating story, then join our club.
I'm either too tired to start masturbating, or I go ahaead and finished it. Never been in the middle. A couple of times, usually when I've been drunk, I've been too tired to finish having sex. Can't remember any stories about it though. I must've fallen asleep.
15. Write down three true facts, and one lie. Don't tell us which one is the lie (y'all have to guess)
1) I still live with my parents
2) I'm a police officer
3) I own a Lambourgini
4) I lost my virginity when I was 17 (late starter)
16. Insert your favorite cute/cuddly picture (just to make us smile).
Sid, my cockatiel.
17. If you cooked a dinner for someone you were head over heels in love with, what would you cook?
I made my girlfriend Cheesy Beanos the other day.
18. If you had to write something on your forehead and walk around with it all day, what would it be?
Probably just my name "Ben".
19. What is your favorite piece of art, and would you please post a picture of it below?
American Gothis, By Grant Wood
20. Would you have sex with Xena, Warrior Princess? What would it be like? Also, if you said no, are you crazy? What are your reasons for declining?
I wouldn't. She would totally crush me and she is a real man woman. She looks like a drag queen, and that look just doesn't pump my nads.
21. Whats your favorite animal? show us.
He's the one and only.
22. If you were a color, what color would you be? Why?
I would be a nice purple, becasue its nice and bright but also kinda dark. A happy medium.
23. What turns you on? If it invovles a ball gag, please describe.
I like boobies. And vaginas. Women in general turn me on. i dunno what else. Its cool to see a chick touch herself as well. Never even tried a ball gag. Not really tried too many sex toys at all actually.
24. On a scale of 1 to 10, how dumb is it to decline the above question by answering 'that's too personal' ?
I'd give it an 8. Some people are just really inhibited. Give them a beer and then see what thay say.
25. Why are ball gags sexy?
umm....
Q: Did you hear about the 150-pound man who had 75-pound testicles?
A: He was half nuts.
Did you find that sexy?
26. Do you have any personal opinions on ice trays?
Ice Trays are good. Its nice to have a cold drink. Dont have any problem with them.
27. What's the most painful thing you've ever had done to you/done to another person during sex?
One time just at the start of sex where the foreplay was skipped I went to put it in, but it wasnt moist enough and the "banjo string" on my willy snapped. Was quite sore and there was a lot of blood. Enough said.
28. If you had to be stranded for the rest of your life on a desert island and pick one person to go with you, would you pick someone you could really talk to or someone who gave you the best sex of your life? If you say both, youre a fucking whore.
I think I'd go for someone who I could really talk to. You can only have sex for so long before your dick goes red raw and you need a rest. But if there was someone who you could really talk to that would be better becasue you'd be able to talk to them for the majority of the day. Plus if it was the best sex of your life for the rest of your life then pretty soon it would just be the regular normal sex. I'm quite a chatty persom as well. I need conversation.
29. What is the biggest insult someone could tell you?
Nothing really offends me anymore. I've had every insult and threat imaginable thrown at me. So I just brush it all off now.
30. If you were/are a big dyke, would you wear the strap on or would your partner?
I think we'd have to take turns. I like to think I'm a considerate lover, and for one person to wear the strap on that mean the only one person would be getting the pleasure (I'd imagine). So turns about would be the only fair way i think.
Sorry I'm not the most interesting person.
Ben
x
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
misstyrios:
Nevermind - the story is copied and pasted, which is unacceptable for publication.
tahliana:
hey pics 3 4 and 5 of my set are meant to be at the end..... go have another look and hopefully it makes more sense this time!!!!!! (ive emailed to have it fixed up) thanks for the comment on my set tho